Sunday, October 02, 2005

What the H-E Double Hockey Sticks?

So, yesterday I got a voicemail from Elizabeth. She said she would really like to be my friend again, that we should get together so she could find out what's been going on in my life. Now, I don't hate her, I don't want her to feel any pain from this situation, but I can't put myself in a position where I can't trust myself. I KNOW I would fall for her again, that's the way I am, and I refuse to get hurt again, at least that way. I'm not ready to renew that friendship. And I don't trust her. I can't trust her. Like it or not, she lied to me. It's not as if I want to remain untrusting, but I need to be careful.

My relationship with God, my job, my friendships with Gabe and Steve, and Flatiron City are my biggest priorities. They take up most of my time, so even if I wanted to spend time with Elizabeth again, I don't have time. I can't make time either. I need to get ahead of the game with Flatiron, I'm going to be getting some overtime at the store two weeks this month, and I have church a half an hour away from where I live two nights a week. I just don't want to spend any more energy than I am. But most of all, I WON'T get myself into a position to get hurt.

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